Day 2 recap, and a ramble

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Day 2 recap, and a ramble

Post  marie.barber on Fri Mar 04, 2011 8:00 pm

Well, yesterday was day 2 and it was a success Smile I kind of knew it would be, because right now my mind is really in it. People talk about will power all the time, and when they go off the wagon they think they don't have enough will power. I think that's not the way to look at it. We ALL want to lose weight- we all have the will to lose weight. If we didn't, we would not be here and we would not be so dedicated to this process. It has nothing to do with will. The way I look at it, it's just about making a choice. I can choose to change the way I eat in order to get the results I want, or I can choose to take the easy way out and stay unhappy in my own skin. I choose to be happy, and I choose to eat well in the way that I know will lead me to my goals. Before I always wanted it, sure, for years I wanted to lose weight, but I was never ready to actually make the choice to change my habits. Now that I have made that choice there's no turning back Smile

Don't get me wrong, yesterday was not easy, but it really wasn't hard, either. I stuck to my plan, which was:

Breakfast: nothing (0)
Lunch: 5 bite pizza (140)
Dinner: 1 pop tart (200)
TOTAL: 340 calories

Again, I know the calories don't matter but for now it's a way of assuring myself that I'm doing okay and still in control. Yesterday I was hungrier than the first day. I'm not sure if it's because I ate dinner a bit earlier (6:30), didn't drink as much water (though I still drank lots), or because I was more physically active yesterday. The desire to eat was there and it was physical hunger, not just head hunger, but it wasn't so bad and after a couple of hours it went away.

My fiance offered me extra bites of food last night, because he knew I was hungry. I said no. I want to explain to you guys WHY I said no; I want it recorded so when I'm feeling weak I can read back over it and remember how strong and motivated I feel right now.
1. It's not about the extra bites adding calories, it's about the extra bites opening the floodgates for me to overeat. Those few extra bites I would have taken really would not have been very many calories at all, and I'm sure I still would have had a good weight loss. BUT if I give myself permission to go off track, it gets easier and easier to make that choice. "Oh, I ate a few more bites of a pop tart, I didn't die, I'm not back up to 173 pounds magically.... Well maybe I can have a bite of his spaghetti, too. And you know what? I worked out today, I'm entitled to a larger amount of food." No. I'm ENTITLED to look and feel the way that I want. I'm ENTITLED to be in control of my actions and the choices I make. I'm not setting myself up for failure, and for someone with an all or nothing mentality like me, once I cheat a little I'm done for.
2. Extra bites may not necessarily stall my weight loss, but they will definitely negate the commitment I made to myself. I committed to do the 5 bite diet as designed until I reach a size I'm comfortable at. The means giving it 100% of my energy. Not just because it will get me to my dream size sooner, but because I want to feel a sense of accomplishment for sticking with something I've committed to. How many of us have started a diet, stopped a diet, started a diet, stopped a diet, quit a diet, gave up on a diet, said it was "too hard" and "not worth it." That was me All My Life. I don't want to live like this anymore. When I don't lose weight it's not just dealing with the sense of disappointment because I still feel fat. It's also the disappointment that I set my mind to something and I Failed. I'm tired of being a failure. I have very low self-esteem and I feel like a failure in a lot of ways, but this is the ONE WAY I can take some of that control back. And darn it, that's exactly what I'm doing. I don't want to think to myself, "I can do this," because honestly, that's not good enough for me anymore. I want to say to myself, "I AM doing this!" And I'm going to be proud of that. I'm already very proud of myself for making this choice, and it's just getting better and better.

Sorry for the little ramble, but these thoughts were on my mind last night and this journal is not just for me to record what I eat (repetitively, in my case) but for me to gain some insight so that I don't sabotage myself along the way. I hope the rest of you guys are doing GREAT. Remember, it's not just that we can do it; we ARE doing it Smile

-marie-
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marie.barber

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Preach on Sister!!

Post  Readyforchange on Fri Mar 04, 2011 11:36 pm

Marie,

You embody the mindset that equals success on this diet. You are doing this! We can do it if we get our heads into the game and make it our total commitment. You are right, if we open the floodgates with extra bites, it will make it hard to stop. I have had this problem recently. I just sat myself down today and made a recommitment to what I want from this diet. You just gave voice to the dialog I had in my head with myself! Freaky.

We ARE doing this. I am committed and strong with you!

Take care,

Readyforchange

Readyforchange

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Join date : 2011-02-04

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Re: Day 2 recap, and a ramble

Post  marie.barber on Sat Mar 05, 2011 6:34 pm

You go girl! WE ARE doing it! I really hope the people reading this, whether members of this forum or not, can find the motivation to just start this and keep going. I think everyone who's ever wanted to lose weight understands the frustration of failing at diets, and I think one just comes to a point where enough is enough and it's time to take control of your own destiny. Keep up the good work!
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marie.barber

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